How to Combine Bank Accounts After Marriage

With financial problems being the number one cause of divorce, combining your finances is a very important part of coming together as a married couple. There may be a part of you that fears it, but keeping your finances separate will hurt you long term. I honestly don't think you can look at sharing your finances in purely logical terms-what's in your heart has to be in the equation as well. In this article, I will share tips on how to make the transition easier.

1) Before you get married and physically combine the bank accounts, there are some things you can do while you're engaged.

I definitely suggest pre-marriage counseling and attending some financial classes. These will help determine your attitudes about money and make sure you're in agreement over your goals. Neither of you are going to be perfect or expect the other person to be, but it helps to know your strengths as well as areas you need to work on.

Shortly after getting married, my husband and I attended a day-long auditorium-style class taught by the author and financial counselor Dave Ramsey and later took a 13-week course of similar material. There are similar resources everywhere in the country. It's just a matter of admitting to yourself that you need it, and nearly everyone does since finances are rarely taught in school.

2) When you physically began combining the accounts, it's a good idea around the same time to create a budget as a couple.

This does not have to be anything overly-complicated or limiting. You just need to know on a monthly basis where your money is going.

There's also nothing wrong with having "fun money" for each of you to spend for yourselves, but with a budget you know you're not accidentally spending money for the electric bill, etc.

3) There's also the issue with "your debt" and "your spouse's debt" become "our debt."

You have to work together to clean messes up if you want to be a financially stable couple and later family.

If you take this attitude that your spouse should clean up their own mess without any help, the problem likely won't get solved. It's in working together that you can get a lot more accomplished and hold each other accountable.

More Tips:

• All of this is not going to happen overnight, and you're not going to do it perfectly starting out. That's okay though as long as you keep trying. The result after thinking this way for 3 years for us is a stronger marriage and better finances than we had as individuals.
• If you really feel strongly about not combining finances, you may need to explore the underlying reasons why. Money itself is likely not the true problem in those situations.